In a lifetime filled with varied emotions, there are countless experiences we come across which change us for the better.And, during such encounters, there is bound to an experience which leaves us with some truly painful or bad memories which can leave a gaping emotional wound for years to come. Letting go of such memories is crucial for mental well-being. If left unattended, they can become quicksands of dormant negative feelings which gobble us up, when we least expect it.
Scientific studies have proven that our brains change form and function, each time you remember a memory or recollect something, it comes back stronger and more charged. The act of remembering affects a memory. This is one reason, why wallowing in self-pity and depressive thoughts is a downward spiral one can’t get out of.
Let it go
Don’t lock away negative thoughts into some far corner of your mind. Sometimes expressing the hurt you feel to a loved one or friend can dissipate it. You can even write about your feelings in a journal to get it out of your system. When you do this, it will be easier to understand why you feel so hurt.
Think about how much of the hurt you feel is of your own accord. How much it are you yourself responsible for? You need to ask yourself whether there is anything you could have done differently. You also need to look at the larger picture and figure out whether you want your pain to become your identity.
Forgive and forget
In the long scheme of things, it’s easy to let bad memories and all those slights overpower the good memories. Sometimes, it’s better to be the bigger person and forgive the individual who hurt you. It could be a loved one, a superior, or a friend. Forgiving someone doesn’t mean you are weak, it shows that you are a good person and that you want to move forward. Most importantly, you need to forgive yourself too. That is the most important part of healing yourself.