A new study has found that people often look for love in the same type of person over and over again.“It’s common that when a relationship ends, people attribute the breakup to their ex-partner’s personality and decide they need to date a different type of person. Our research suggests there’s a strong tendency to nevertheless continue to date a similar personality,” said lead author Yoobin Park.
Using data from an ongoing multi-year study on couples and families across several age groups, Park and co-author Geoff MacDonald, compared the personalities of current and past partners of 332 people. Their primary finding was the existence of a significant consistency in the personalities of an individual’s romantic partners.
Participants in the study along with a sample of current and past partners assessed their own personality traits related to agreeableness, conscientiousness, extraversion, neuroticism, and openness to experience.They were polled on how much they identified with a series of statements such as, “I am usually modest and reserved”, “I am interested in many different kinds of things” and “I make plans and carry them out”. Respondents were asked to rate their disagreement or agreement with each statement on a five-point scale.
“And though our data do not make clear why people’s partners exhibit similar personalities, it is noteworthy that we found partner similarity above and beyond similarity to oneself.” On the other hand, Park said the strategies people learn to manage their partner’s personality can also be negative, and that more research is needed to determine how much meeting someone similar to an ex-partner is a plus, and how much it’s a minus when moving to a new relationship.“So, if you find you’re having the same issues in the relationship after relationship, you may want to think about how gravitating toward the same personality traits in a partner is contributing to the consistency in your problems,” said Park.