Creating a safe space for kids to open up emotionally
New Delhi: Being a parent can be a fulfilling yet intimidating experience of a lifetime. To be a parent means trying to help the child grow into a mature human being. They want to ensure the child does not get trapped in the parents’ own trial and error and emotional baggage. Many parents have issues of their own. Whatever the trouble, this impacts their parenting style.
Thus, it is vital to set up a protected environment for children to connect with their parents. It helps the child become an emotionally secure individual. It is essential to be emotionally present as the child’s future as an adult depends crucially on this. Here are a few ways by Manoj Jain, Director, Scram Kidswear, to develop the right environment that naturally allows the child to connect with their parents.
KEEP AN OPEN RELATIONSHIP
This pointer allows parents to connect with the child and give them a safe space to deal with life’s journey better. When children can converse with their parents about anything under the sun, they quickly identify that such an open relationship helps them become mature individuals and is the key to good living or resolving issues. It teaches them about honesty, dealing with discomfort, and not keeping secrets in relationships. But this honesty should be suitable for the child’s capability to absorb it. Parents also need to tell their children that they are always with them. This unconditional love becomes the child’s protective field in dealing with negative or fearful situations. Remember Harry Potter and his mother’s love that protected him against Lord Voldemort?
DISMISSING EMOTIONS
Asking the child to bear with their troubles on their own makes them more secretive and become broken from inside. It can be a start for the child’s trust issues and anxiety and can become a demon to deal with when grown up. If the child is going through an emotion, parents must walk with and help them deal with it better. Never allow the child to deal with it or dismissively tell them to walk through it. The issue might seem small for the parents but is a big deal for the child. Children then learn to deal with similar situations in a better fashion and become good at resolving hurdles.
AVOID BEING JUDGEMENTAL/OVER-REACTING
These two factors can cause maximum damage to the parent-child relationship. Children are incapable of understanding the gravity of situations at times and can be fearful of things. Whatever the case, parents must not judge their child or overreact. Resolve issues with a simple explanation that helps the child feel safe and deal with them better. These can be THE life lessons for the children.
RECOGNISING THE ISSUES & SYMPATHISING
When parents authenticate anything the child shares sympathetically, the child knows that the relationship is a safe one wherein they are allowed to share anything without fear. It does not automatically mean the parents agree with everything. It only means that the parent understands the situation and the resultant outbreak. It allows parents to share views and give their opinion. It can help if they share their own experiences to relate to their children. All this aids parents in teaching positive stuff that stays with the children in the longer run. Allow the child to absorb everything to become an individual who decides their path without losing focus of either self or ethics.
TEACH THEM ABOUT FAILURE
Trying to shield the child from negativity is typical. But children must understand the failure without letting it overshadow their minds. Parents need to let their children realise that this failure can become a stepping stone towards better things. Teach children about honest reflections and limitations. It makes children notice their flaws and rework them. They will keep on trying, learning and succeeding more healthily.
HELP UNDERSTAND CONTROL & CHOICES
It truly can help children comprehend the importance of control and making choices that can impact one’s life. This springboard to jump into adulthood gives them the life lesson of the cause and effect of their choice and proper life control. Of course, the parents must be there but in shadows. Give honest advice if asked. Keep the route open for any queries. Parents should show happiness in positive things and sympathise when things go wrong.
