Opinion: A date with algorithms

The integration of AI into dating threatens to further disconnect and isolate us.

Hyderabad: For those lamenting over declining human connections due to an all-pervading domination of gadgets, here is some more depressing news. AI (Artificial Intelligence) is making its way into the dating world, choosing your soulmate by matching the profiles. With loneliness among the youth emerging as an urban epidemic, algorithms have come to replace the human touch. Artificial Intelligence is set to take over emotional intelligence. In the words of Whitney Herd, CEO of ‘Bumble’, a popular dating platform, “AI is the future of dating.” Here is what an AI-driven dating looks like: A romantic app scans your dating profile and makes a chatbot based on that information. Then it matches your chatbot with other people’s chatbots and has them go on “dates” — all without you having to be involved. After the two chatbots have their awkward first conversation, like “what are your hobbies?” “Do I have to live with your parents?”, you can review the chat logs and see if you think the other real person is worth actually messaging in real life. Many find this scenario — integration of AI into intimate spaces —very scary. There is no doubt that the technology and Large Language Models (LLMs) like ChatGPT are immensely useful tools in a myriad fields ranging from medicine to coding but they cannot replace the real world connections. Love language is beyond the reach of algorithms; It may be imperfect but is purely human. The integration of AI into dating threatens to further disconnect and isolate us.

Human intimacy is not about perfection. It is about navigating the imperfections, complexities and vulnerabilities with an empathetic mind to make relationships work. Making mistakes and learning from them is fundamental to human experience. Using AI to minimise the likelihood of missteps and conflict will turn us into confused souls, unable to navigate the messy, complex — and thereby beautiful — terrain of direct human connection. The quest for perfection in relationships, whether with humans or AI, reveals a fundamental misunderstanding of the nature of intimacy and connection. True relationships are not about flawlessness but about mutual understanding, growth, and shared experiences. The limitations of AI underscore the complexities inherent in human relationships that cannot be simplified or substituted by technology. The yearning for love and the need to connect is as old as human civilisation. However, the irony of our times is that even in a highly connected world, one is often lonely. The allure of AI companionship, with its immediate responsiveness and adaptability, may seem like an appealing escape from the challenges of dating in the modern world. Yet, we must recognise that AI cannot replicate the intricacies of genuine human interactions. There are also safety concerns over AI-driven dating because one is required to give the most intimate details and personal preferences to these platforms in order to share this data with whomever they see fit

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